Will Rogers Quotes
Politicians, after all, are not over a year behind public opinion.
The Autobiography of Will Rogers (1949)
You've got to be [an] optimist to be a Democrat, and you've got to be a humorist to stay one.
Radio Show, June 24, 1934.
Politics has got so expensive that it takes a lot of money to even get beat with nowadays.
Daily Telegrams, June 28, 1931.
Us ignorant people laugh at spiritualists, but when they die, they go mighty peaceful and happy.
Daily Telegrams, July 7, 1930.
Anything important is never left to the vote of the people. We only get to vote on some man; we never get to vote on what he is to do.
Diplomats are just as essential to starting a war as soldiers are for finishing it ... You take diplomacy out of war, and the thing would fall flat in a week.
I don't care how poor and inefficient a little country is; they like to run their own business. I know men that would make my wife a better husband than I am, but, darn it, I'm not going to give her to 'em.
If we ever pass out as a great nation we ought to put on our tombstone, 'America died from a delusion that she has moral leadership.'
If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep.
If you want to be successful, it's just this simple. Know what you are doing. Love what you are doing. And believe in what you are doing.
Let advertisers spend the same amount of money improving their product that they do on advertising and they wouldn't have to advertise it.
Most people and actors appearing on the stage have some writer write their material. I don't do that. Congress is good enough for me. They have been writing my material for years.
My father was one eighth Cherokee and my mother one fourth Cherokee, which I figure makes me about an eight cigar-store Injun.
No man can be condemned for owning a dog. As long as he has a dog, he has a friend; and the poorer he gets, the better friend he has.
The man with the best job in the country is the Vice President. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, "How's the President?"
The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure it was drawn up by a lawyer.
When you put down the good things you ought to have done and leave out the bad things you did do -- that's Memoirs.
You can't say that civilization don't advance, however, for in every war they kill you in a new way.
I don't think you can make a lawyer honest by an act of legislature. You've got to work on his conscience. And his lack of conscience is what makes him a lawyer.
The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure that it was drawn up by a lawyer.